Thought I'd get back to this now rather than later. Changes: Larger lead - making the 'H' the body of the pencil instead of the negative space in it, the 'i' is still less obvious but am happy. Use of squiggly line (A) and perspective pencil mark (B) help guide the viewers eye.
If you've seen this already try and image you haven't and that you don't know its a pencil...
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| (A) |
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| (B) |
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